Firstly, “Is this real life?!”
So, I’m hating myself for even thinking, let alone, writing about this, but this just crosses the line. I really do hate it when people talk about Radiohead like they’re some sacred cow. It’s totally obnoxious…blah blah blah…But, I really don’t care because I unabashedly adore them. “OK Computer” consumed a few years of my life. Yeah, I know, how utterly typical. Whatever. However, this conversation is basically the worst. Miley Cyrus is not allowed to let Radiohead enter her thoughts, let alone listen to them. And, definitely never ever expect to actually meet Thom Yorke.
So, she’s very coy in the first few minutes about this band that dissed her at the Grammy’s. A band that is “the reason she loves music”. Ugh. Throws in the adjective “stinkin!” somewhere along the line which will undoubtably catch on like wildfire with the tween contingent. Then, these shitty morning radio DJs are like, “No, lemme guess..Bon Jovi? Foo Fighters? The Wiggles? U2 is the BEST…Coldplay is soooo good. But Chris Martin is so quirky in interviews. Haha!!” My rising anger boils over at this point.
Miley: no amount of your threatening Disney wranglers is going to intimidate them into meeting you, because no matter how much money you make, they’re always going to be fundamentally better people than you. They have something that money can never buy: integrity. I know it’s a dreadfully confusing concept to you, but it’s something that truly talented people who passionately believe in their craft possess and an unwavering belief system that they live by. Let me break it down for you. Essentially, they’d rather die than be a glorified whore for a large media conglomerate. They take on indie projects for the love of the process, because they are constantly pushing their own personal boundaries and absolutely must challenge themselves to live, and not to gain some sort of “hip” credibility. They make music because they MUST. Success is just a serendipitous perk that comes along with living their lives in a truly authentic way. I know, I know, you’ll never get it.
And you cried when you met Chris Martin because no matter what you accomplish in life, you’re always going to be a painfully typical person without any original thought to say or think. Oh, I’d highly recommend not listening to the last few seconds of the interview because (spoiler) she butchers a few lines of “Creep” and your soul will die a little inside having heard it.
And, no, self-proclaimed “music aficionado” morning radio show DJ, “Sex on Fire” is not the best song ever. You clearly don’t know anything about music due to your praise for Coldplay, U2 and KOL when they’re all clearly past their prime, entirely soulless and churning out the radio hits, having resigned themselves to another cog in the music industry machine. As a side note, why hasn’t KOL starred in an Apple commercial? And, no, Miley, their dad doesn’t own a church in Switzerland. He was a Pentecostal pastor that was “defrocked” because he was a deadbeat alcoholic father in back water Tennessee. How are you not friends with Bono? My disdain for the current KOL media whirlwind will have to be resigned for another post, though. But, seriously, who the hell hadn’t heard of them before their latest? They have like 4 albums yet people act like they’re a new band. And, the best still remains “Aha Shake Heartbreak” which was released in 2004. If I have to hear someone say, “Dude, I am so loving this new band. They’re called Kings of Leon. I discovered them. They’re pretty obscure and a little different, but I think you’ll love em!” or another conversation along those lines, I will get mad and…not do anything.
grAD Tart 